Sunday Reflections – “Why are you a Christian?” ~ Pastor Nick Lennon

What a Sunday.

First, let me apologize for being MIA for a few weeks. I’ve been, not so much in a funk, but not really feeling it. There was more going on around my house than usual and I wasn’t in a writing mood I guess. Hopefully those times won’t be often. I’m just learning to do things for myself and I need to be in the habit of taking this time to take care of me.

I feel, slightly, as though I’ve been  having a crisis of faith recently. I believe in God. I count myself a Christian. I go to church fairly regularly. But that connection, I haven’t felt it in a while. I’ve been learning to press on during these times but I guess I didn’t head this one off in enough time, it got to me a little.

Today in church my pastor asked us the question, “Why are you a Christian?”

Christianity is based on the belief in Christ.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. -John 3:16

I’ve been struggling with my belief in Jesus. I believe in God, but sometimes my belief in Jesus falters. This happens when I allow world too much influence over me. When I listen to certain songs or watch certain movies or tv shows.

After service today I had some hard conversations with myself and then with God.

To self:

Why is this so difficult for you? You know you believe in God, why is believing in Christ so hard? I need proof. I don’t want to be made a fool of if I am wrong. I just don’t understand this ‘relationship’ with Christ thing. How am I supposed to have a relationship with Christ when He doesn’t talk back. You know you are supposed to be reading your Bible and that is when He will speak to you. I don’t mean reading what He has to say. I mean hearing what He has to say. You know damn well you heard Him when you thought you were sick! Where is that faith now??

Yeah, that was a slap to the face. Immediately, my conversation with God began and my apologies for my lack of faith flowed.

I took a fresh look at my past. A real one, not one glossed over to look pretty in a ‘where are they now?’ segment. I was an idolater, adulterer, a deviant, a thief, I dishonored my mother and step-dad. I did immoral things that I will never be proud of. This is real, this is the reality. I can make all of that really pretty. Tie it up with a bow and present it like ‘now look at me!’. But this is not my accomplishment.

My human nature would have me back in Mayport, without one single change. But GRACE alone got me where I am. God’s plan for my life. When I started listening and following is when I started seeing the plan. Obviously, I have days (weeks) when I get derailed. But that is okay. Because He is waiting for me, patiently.

Why am I a Christian? The answer is supposed to be because Christ is worth it. I’m getting there. Right now, the answer is because He loves me.